GRANDIOSE narcissists
Kanye, Elon, Trump. What do they have in common? They command wealth to a degree that working people cannot truly comprehend, yet each is losing a significant percentage of their fortune. Why are they losing? In 2022, these three trolls unmistakably displayed their true colors to the public. Intelligent observers boiled them down to their essence: Kanye, Elon, and Trump are “grandiose narcissists”. In lay terms, they are insufferable attention whores.
Today is the Second Anniversary of the Attack on the U.S. Capitol. Let’s take a moment to recognize three individuals who continue to promote the ideologies and incentives for such attacks. Trump, via multiple avenues of evidence, was directly linked to the failed soft putsch of 2021. Kanye and Elon have since joined him in an effort to destroy truth and fabricate an alternative to our shared reality — a reality the three of them despise. By extension, you are (more likely than not) one of the people they consider an enemy.
Jesus weeps again
“I pray to Jesus that Elon is for real… JESUS IS KING”, wrote Kanye. He wouldn’t be the first to admire both Jesus and Hitler; maybe this trend is making a comeback (albeit by all those same low IQ folks who don’t know much about Jesus). “Jesus taught love, kindness and forgiveness”, wrote Elon in response to Kayne. That really takes the cake. Elon long ago jettisoned anything resembling kindness or forgiveness. As for Mr. Trump, we haven’t an honest shred of evidence that he knows what Jesus taught, and we can only laugh at the idea of Trump being capable of forgiving somebody.
Who wants to let these three know that it’s easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God? This all goes to say that billionaire frauds like these pay lip service to Jesus while doing the opposite of what the answer would be if one asked, “What would Jesus do?”
Kanye diagnosis
Kanye, Elon, Trump. Nobody should indulge Kanye by referring to him as “Ye”. It’s a shameless human version of “New and Improved!” added to the label of a brand. “Now with more Hitler”, we find out. Problem? The only problem for many on the Right is that he’s saying the quiet part out loud (in a way that crosses the few lines Trump never did). What about a conservative Jewish media celebrity like Ben Shapiro? He brushed off Kayne’s parroting of Nazi propaganda as mental illness. Some liberals have done the same because they refuse to accept that Kanye is not a good person.
Should we cut Kanye a break because he’s bipolar? Of course not. Many people know someone who’s bipolar: they realize it’s not a condition that causes antisemitism. The neo-Nazi propaganda recited by Kanye may be a new twist, be he was a bigot before he read it on the Internet (it’s obvious he doesn’t read books).
Kanye prognosis
I could care less about Kanye’s past or future. In the present, he’s obviously doing more harm than good. Whatever his contributions to culture were in the past, 2023 would be better off without him around. If only we could invent a time machine so that Kanye might be sent back in time to experience history.
His first trip would ideally be to Germany in the 1930s, where he could get to know some of the nice fellows who wore brown shirts. He may find that the Sturmabteilung treats him differently than Fuentes does today. If he were somehow able to avoid being put into a camp by the nice people who invented highways and microphones, he could take the time machine to the Antebellum South and explain to black folk there how slavery’s just a lifestyle choice. If by some miracle he managed to not get lynched for trying to explain this, he could go all the way back in time to the Crusades. Would love to hear how that goes.
Elon diagnosis
Kanye, Elon, Trump. Elon Musk is the L. Ron Hubbard of unimaginative libertarian thugs. His simps and stans have become almost as insufferable as their vastly overvalued hero. Elon’s tweets — like those issued by the failed former POTUS when he was on the platform — are tantamount to royal proclamations. Like any right-wing populist cult leader, Elon knows how to work his marks with language that is politically correct for their ears. Contrary to popular belief, Elon is not a genius. But like Trump, he knows what to say to his simps, stans, fanboys, and cultists.
If you’re the 2nd richest person in the world who lords over more people and resources than any individual should ethically be able to in the 21st century, maybe — just maybe — you shouldn’t go out of your way to be a major league world champ a$$hole. While Elon’s wealth almost guarantees that he can be a yuge a$$hole without suffering the consequences that we non-billionaires would have to contend with if we behaved similarly, a decent person would understand that owning a truly obscene share of the pie comes with responsibilities. If he weren’t so ostentatiously arrogant, he could learn from Bill Gates trying to do the right thing.
Given Elon’s behavior in 2022, more people are finally aware that Elon is not a decent member of our species. He belongs on Mars. But make no mistake, his cultists admire how Elon goes out of his way to be a dick, and they revel in how he exploits and abuses working people. Word to the wise: if you meet someone who admires Elon Musk, you’re best off making a point of not developing a personal relationship with them.
Elon prognosis
With any luck, 2023 will not be a good year for Elon. If he had learned anything from Trump’s very public show of hatred for truth and decency, he would not be following in Trump’s footsteps. Now that the damage has already been done, we can count ourselves fortunate that Elon has little understanding of just how much sh!t good people are willing to put up with. He will eventually wear out his welcome with the majority of Homo sapiens. As with Trump, Elon lacks the self-awareness or humility to save himself from his worst instincts. We’ll be writing an evolving post about this bloated cat turd, so stay tuned.
Benito Cheeto, aka BLOTUS
Kanye, Elon, Trump. Most of what can be said about the king of danger clowns, Donald Trump, has been said. It’s insulting that we still need to even mention his name, but since Trump is the herpes of 2020s Murican politics, it can be challenging to completely ignore him. His rhetoric becomes more radical and nihilistic by the day, which guarantees that his nation will follow, regardless of whether he is reelected in 2024. It’s exhausting to even write more than a paragraph about such a wealthy lowlife, so let’s save some time and agree that Trump Is An A$$hole. If you only have time for reading burp-ups, simply check out his completely insane posts on the network he owns. The only living person more full of sh!t than Donald Trump is George Santos (if that’s his real name).